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Wednesday, September 21, 2011

The Cross Roads....

Well well well... I kinda find myself at a junction of sorts... 
I have spent the last few weeks undergoing the rigors of a very thorough recruiting process 
necessary to progress to the next level of my career. 
A level which will eventually lead to a fantastic opportunity for my family and I, an 
opportunity to provide us with a certain amount of security for our future.

Whoop whoop for me right? yes I am excited but it also means the commitment 
of ALOT of time and effort on my behalf so I have to make some 
decisions about my blogging and photography. I just won't be able to do it
all going forward. Right now I'm weighing up my options and considering how
best to plan my time. When thinking about closing down the blog I realize
I will miss it so much... the therapy, the camaraderie, the laughs, the bullshit... 
it's like losing a little friend one turns to in times of need. Maybe I can just post 
when I want to and not actually think to much about it... oh wait... isn't that what 
I do now??? pretty much!!! 

I'm going to have to make my time with the family count extra because there will be less 
of it. Instead of thinking in terms of a blogger listening to their chatter and thinking
"ooohhh that would make a good post".. I'll have to be fully engaged thinking.."ooohhh
these are our memories". I am sure I will continue sticking the camera in their faces
at every available opportunity. I don't think that will ever stop. 

The hard thing for me is that I want to be good at everything I do... such a freak! 
I want to be the best ever parent in the world, I want my kids to look back and think 
that I was a good Mom and taught them well, helped them grow in to good, productive and
kind citizens. I want to be the best photographer I can be, to learn the art and be able
to produce fantastic pictures to look back on, whether it be as a "pro" or otherwise. 
I realize that if this new opportunity means I can no longer have my own photography 
business then I can still keep it as an uber-hobby. I can continue to learn and read and 
absorb all I can, maybe focus on it in a little different way, more for personal 
pleasure than as a way to make a living. I actually think my foray into professional 
photography has taught me a valuable lesson but that's for some other time .. some other
post.  I am envisioning that this new path my life is about to take is going to be a 
huge change for us, I don't know if I will even have time to dwell on how 
super perfect I want to be.... I'll just have to be super perfect without thinking
about it!!!! 

"It is time for you to stop being an extra in other people's movies, and be the 
star of your own." ~Alan Cohen

Thanks Liz.. The Fragrant Muse for the quote!!! 


Teri said...

It is so difficult to find a great balance with everything in life. Sounds like you are focusing on what matters most, which is fantastic!

Indiri @ Turning Stones said...

Making blogging a little more laid back seemed to make it easier to fit it in and not sacrifice family time. I stopped worrying about what readers would want and whether I would lose them, etc. At first I lost readers but I kept going in the direction I wanted to go and I ended up getting back more than I lost.

Take it easy, don't worry about it, love your hubby and your girls and kiss them lots. All of this change is gonna be fun :)

Coffeypot said...

Follow your dream...or the one that pays the best. Your choice! But the bogging will be here when you have the time. Good luck.

Barbara said...

Oh my gosh, except for the exciting advancement of a career part, this sounds just like me, trying to decide how to balance my day and wanting to be an expert at everything! Good luck and congrats! But don't give up your blog :)

Ali said...

awww thanks guys.. I'm thinking that once I'm not stressing over the photography part I will be able to relax and blog like I used to.. just for moi!!!!

Liz said...

Blogging is supposed to be fun not stressful!!! Just make time for it when you have it!