Well well well... I kinda find myself at a junction of sorts...
I have spent the last few weeks undergoing the rigors of a very thorough recruiting process
necessary to progress to the next level of my career.
A level which will eventually lead to a fantastic opportunity for my family and I, an
opportunity to provide us with a certain amount of security for our future.
Whoop whoop for me right? yes I am excited but it also means the commitment
of ALOT of time and effort on my behalf so I have to make some
decisions about my blogging and photography. I just won't be able to do it
all going forward. Right now I'm weighing up my options and considering how
best to plan my time. When thinking about closing down the blog I realize
I will miss it so much... the therapy, the camaraderie, the laughs, the bullshit...
it's like losing a little friend one turns to in times of need. Maybe I can just post
when I want to and not actually think to much about it... oh wait... isn't that what
I do now??? pretty much!!!
I'm going to have to make my time with the family count extra because there will be less
of it. Instead of thinking in terms of a blogger listening to their chatter and thinking
"ooohhh that would make a good post".. I'll have to be fully engaged thinking.."ooohhh
these are our memories". I am sure I will continue sticking the camera in their faces
at every available opportunity. I don't think that will ever stop.
The hard thing for me is that I want to be good at everything I do... such a freak!
I want to be the best ever parent in the world, I want my kids to look back and think
that I was a good Mom and taught them well, helped them grow in to good, productive and
kind citizens. I want to be the best photographer I can be, to learn the art and be able
to produce fantastic pictures to look back on, whether it be as a "pro" or otherwise.
I realize that if this new opportunity means I can no longer have my own photography
business then I can still keep it as an uber-hobby. I can continue to learn and read and
absorb all I can, maybe focus on it in a little different way, more for personal
pleasure than as a way to make a living. I actually think my foray into professional
photography has taught me a valuable lesson but that's for some other time .. some other
post. I am envisioning that this new path my life is about to take is going to be a
huge change for us, I don't know if I will even have time to dwell on how
super perfect I want to be.... I'll just have to be super perfect without thinking
"It is time for you to stop being an extra in other people's movies, and be the
star of your own." ~Alan Cohen
Thanks Liz.. The Fragrant Muse for the quote!!!