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Thursday, June 17, 2010

Serious Poll.....

OK, I need to know how all you married people with kids and jobs split the household chores?

I'm fed up... absolutely damn fed up of doing what I consider to be everything and what the rest of the family considers to be Mama's job. My husband and I had a disagreement this evening and although I was given some good advice this week to only blog what you "have ownership of" I'm gonna put this out there.... oh yeah, I'm going there!!!!!

Happenstance made it possible for him to take a rare day off from his eleven hour day work schedule, that being so I asked politely if he would vacuum and do a couple of loads of laundry... neither of which got done. I was kinda pissy about it, quite rightly so, I believe. And he thinks I'm being selfish. So while I'm at work all day he's at home doing precisely squat... I came home and, admittedly, we cooked dinner together... then  I cleaned the kitchen, bathed the kids, did more laundry, picked up around the house, put the kids to bed, all while he slept in "his chair".

So when i demanded that he at least put his clean clothes away that had already been sitting on a chair in the bedroom for a week, he was mad. I'm madder. I don't want to air our laundry but air it I shall.... in the name of being a pissy bitchy wife who happens to like a clean tidy house and well brought up kids!!!!!!!!!!!

So dear readers... pray tell... how do you divide the day to day?? do you do certain chores and he does the others? Does your significant other just clean and tidy without being asked? does he/she take pride in your home as much as you do and actually take care of your home without it being a freakin' battle ground??????
I need answers and I need them now.... otherwise I'm hiring a freakin' maid and to hell with the cost!!!!!

11 comments:

kim said...

I say hire help! Then sit down and have a margarita and enjoy it! (Not that I have hired help or a spouse to help, but I do like the idea - of help - not spouse!)

kim said...

did you follow that?

Char said...

sorry - i have a roommate and that's all i have to deal with. i clean my room and he cleans his. he cleans the bathroom and i clean the kitchen.

McGillicutty said...

yep, i followed, that's one vote for hired help.... this is good!

Brian Miller said...

i will admit it is a weakness of our male species...we are born deficient of the ability to see mess...please help us...smiles.

Peterson Family said...

I'm not going to be much help. Hubs takes care of the lawn. I clean the house. The kids have chores they have to do. And when the house gets out of control, we both pitch in and get it clean.

But if I were in your shoes, I'd be hiring someone. For realz.

Lynn said...

For us, it was just a matter of sitting down and talking about what each of us was responisible for. I still feel like I do the majority of the housework, mostly because he just doesn't SEE what needs to be done. But he does the laundry and the dinner dishes, which are jobs I really, really don't like, and if there's anything else I can ask him and it (maybe) will get done--although I often have to wait an age. The yard is, technically, his responsibility, but he's a major procrastinator, so I have to shut my eyes to the fact that it's a meadow sometimes, otherwise I'd go crazy. But I'd rather have a tall yard than a cluttery house, so I can grit my teeth a bit there, and I fear that if I start mowing out of frustration, it will ergo become my job. So I don't. LOL

Good luck. It's a hard one, and I think, although I still get frustrated when I'm working my butt off and he's reading or painting or something, that I lucked out in some ways. I don't know what it is about guys that they just don't SEE things sometimes, whether it's injustice or the dirty socks on the floor.

Stacey said...

yeah... In the land of commiseration (sp?), I am right there alongside you!!!!

I have no help, and I have teens. It is largely my own fault, I did teach them how to treat me, as one Dr. Phil would say.

I have had the ability to hire help, as it were and I loved it! If you can do that, I say go for it! It made me happy, it made Man happier, and it was so very nice to have a picked up house without the grumpy baggage.

I guess I need to hire someone again, huh?

Conny said...

Ooooh, hire help if you're up for it. The Engineer and I have this same blowout every couple years; the fighting is exhausting. The men always think they do waaaay more than they really do - so frustrating. I'm resolved that we'll never see eye-to-eye on this topic, and so chores will be done or not on an as-needed basis - so there, Mr. Engineer. If he complains then he can do more or pay for the housekeeper.

Great subject to post about. I'm sure there will be a chorus chiming in. Cheers ~

Eternally Distracted said...

We have someone who comes to the house three times a week but I actually LOVE cleaning. We both work stupid hours so it helps to have someone in and then it makes it less likely that I notice that Mec does absolutely NOTHING!

Keely said...

I hired house cleaners, which takes a load off, but yeah - hubby and I work opposite shifts, and the way they work out mean that HE is in the house alone a lot while I almost never am without the kid. So I get a little ticked when he has a solid four hours in the afternoon and all he gets done is some dicking around on Facebook.

For him, though, it's that he just doesn't SEE it. If I ask him specifically to do a couple of things, usually at least one of them will get done. Usually.