Yep, I'm going there.....
If this is the season of giving then how come no one is giving to me?
How's that for shallow? I want gifts people gifts, I love a good surprise as much as
the next shallow gold digger!!! Seems that as soon as you become a parent its
all about the kids and they get everything....pouty pout!!!
When you're invited to someone's house over the holidays why do you
feel obligated to take something with you? They did the inviting,
can't I just turn up and enjoy????? Sometimes it's more stressful
thinking of something spectacular to contribute than it would
have been to stay home and order a pizza.
I love a gag gift, have given a few in my time, but you
better back it up with something wonderful like a cashmere
sweater or diamonds buddy otherwise it's just freakin'
rude, yeah.... rude!!!
Make your gift giving thoughful, otherwise you may as well just
dump some vulgar cash in a damn envelope and be done!!!
Nothing gets my shackles up like receiving the same old
shit year after year from the same person... where is the
fun in that? No fun in receiving and you're not telling
me you had fun being a brainless ninny buying the same old
pile of steaming dung year after year????
If you're gonna regift and recycle make sure, damn sure,
that you don't give me back the crappy gift that I
regifted to you three years ago!!!!
Wrapping matters, oh yes, yes it does!!! Even if you have to get
the skinny, spotty faced girl at the store to do it, wrapping MATTERS.
DO NOT... I repeat... DO NOT hand me something in a
freakin' bag from the store where you bought it three minutes
ago on your way to the restaurant or the house or wherever it
is we're getting together to exchange these thoughtfully picked
out, meaningful expressions of our feelings for one another.
And finally, if I hate your gift then I reserve the right to return it
to the store...and if I get there and they tell me it was $3, I'm
reserving the right to cut you out of my life forever!!! I would
much rather get something you made, even cookies than get a piece
of shit thing from Wally World that cost $3!!!!!
And finally, finally on an unshallow, deep, meaningful note
I want to share with you one of my fave "gifts" that a friend of mine
bought for a gift swap and I wanted this the minute I saw it, I beat
everyone up until I was the one who got to take it home!!!
I adore this spoon rest and bring it out every year!! aawwww!!!!