Oh Darlin' don't you ever grow up....

Yet another favorite photo from a recent trip to the beach.. you would think I only have 

one daughter the way my pictures are going wouldn't you? 

Well I actually have two beautiful girls but the eldest is so cool it's impossible

 to take a picture of her these days. 

So I will continue to snap away the little one and hang on to the memories for dear life 

because it won't be long and she too will be an ultra cool tweener and there will 

be no room in her life for an ultra uncool camera toting mother.

She promises me that she will always love me and always be my little girl.

But I know that can't be, she has to grow up one day and it's 

only right that I allow her to do that, to embrace her independence, as much as it 

kills me to even think of it. I know she'll always love me but she 

can't always be little.

So I won't think about it.... I will just live in this moment, the moment when we

still hold hands walking to the shops and share laughs and secrets, the moment where

I can still be the only one to comfort her when she's sad and listen to her little 

stories from school. If truth be told the older one still lets me do these things

too but only when no one is watching and God forbid I actually blog about

anything she does!!! 

Big Bro's Birthday

Today is my brother's birthday... Happy Birthday man... he's 49 today. Whoaaahhh... how in the heck did that happen? I never knew people who are my siblings would ever get to be in their late forties, for the love of all that is sane. Worse than that we have a sister even older still ... but not by a lot and she's aging extremely well, maybe a little too well. Not insinuating she's had work, far from it, but she's always had a super moderate lifestyle and keeps things healthy and it shows. She has great skin and very few wrinkles, she also has perfect feet... totally perfect, not a callus, bunion or a cracked heel in site... stinks!!

Anyway that's not what today's post is about, just thought I'd give a nod to the rest of the family... there's another sister in the middle who, if reading this, is pissed at me right now for leaving her out, that's 'cos she's a middle sister... nuff said.

Anywayway.... I didn't want to do a post on family... I wanted to share with you this picture I took at the weekend... we went to Jacksonville beach (never actually been to Jax beach before and I liked it). I had a wedding shoot to do, so I took the man and little bit with me because that's how I roll. It was a gorgeous evening and although it got a little nippy (or nipplish as my friends says) it was well worth the five and a half million mile drive!!!

I don't know why I love this so much, I just do!  I think it's because I love to see the girls with their Daddy, I could not imagine him as a Dad before they came along and now I see it was always what he was meant to be. He's so good with them, always joking and talking and playing, he's truly there for them and that's what counts in the end. So... not getting all sentimental and girly here.... just pointing out that I love this picture! I may even drag it out of digital nomansland and hang it on the wall... yes... in my house... for everyone to see!

Who knows about this....

Do you blog anonymously? Are you a lurker? you know there are actually readers out there who are.... not bloggers!!! shocking I know. Do you care who reads and what you put out there for the world to know??

This has been on my mind a lot lately and probably the reason for my bloggy block. I can't seem to shake the feeling that someone is reading that I may not want to know all my little secrets that I put on my blog.... so if I don't want it out there then why do I continue???  It's like a dirty little habit I can't break, I love blogging and I love the comments and the pictures, the words, the funnies, the peeps.  But it's all so "virtual" I'm starting to feel uncomfortable about it spilling over into my real life world. I blame Twitter.

Not that I'm ever very controversial but I just feel kind of weird about being judged.... I can't put my finger on it.  Who the hell cares what a forty something Mom of 2 thinks about the world anyway?  My own take on blogging is that I laugh at the funny stuff, cry at the heartbreaking stuff and drool over the wonderfully creative crap people share on their blogs. So what's this feeling of weirdity hanging over me???? Where's it coming from?? maybe I'm getting a little afraid that people are taking it all too seriously sometimes, maybe I'M taking it too seriously. What if I do share the fact that John Travolta will be my next husband or that I love my shih tzu's more than life itself.. is it such a bad thing?

One of my favorite bloggers is Sassy Modern Mom... she recently posted about her own Mom finding her blog.. and what to do about it. Eeeekkk at least I know my mother is not reading but there are others I don't want knowing my inner ramblings... what the heck is a girl to do. I am not entirely anon any more!!!

In other news.... I found a couple of very dark, thick hairs under my chin. I knnnoowwww!!! there is no mole just big hairs that I have to pluck... you can't imagine how hideous it feels to find them...growing there with no notice... but on the bright side Halloween is approaching so it might be a cool addition to my old hag costume.

Happy Wednesday everyone!!!

The Golden Hour....

Just a few shots we took last evening.....

 there's always one with the funny face going on.... 

 I loved how the light was hitting their little blond heads as they enjoyed their hot chocolate... 

 such a cute pic of Ash if I do say so.... 

I love to hang out with the girls.... and I don't think they mind me clicking away while they ham it up...

mighty oaks...

The sun is shining....

Here in South GA the month of October is mostly the best month of the year weather wise... it's sunny and bright but a lot cooler and tends to be less humid, a blessed relief from the inferno of summer.

This year though, October 2011, it's not.  It has rained for much of the month so far and we're almost half way through already. Today for the first time this week I can actually see blue skies from my window as I sit at my desk messing around online picturing my perfect life. Yes, picturing my perfect life... like the rest of you online junkies I'm hooked on Pinterest. It's like a little digital fantasy right there at your fingertips, there's goodies galore to fawn over.  Crafts that I'll never do, recipes I definitely will never try, furniture and design way out of my reach  not to mention the clothes and jewels, I'm obviously not a size zero but I can pin that stuff on my style board and dream.... sigh. A more realistic board for me would be Peachy being Plus...  Then there's the words... oh the lovely words... I think that's my favorite part of it.... I laugh so much at the funny quips and the quotes, I relate to the heartfelt observations preserved artistically for prosperity. I can think of situations to match the wise warnings; every little piece of advice is matched with the corresponding heinous act to which I just five minutes ago fell victim to. "oh yes, that soooo happened to me... Pin It".

I think we all need a little fantasy at times don't we?  I read a blog recently which I totally cannot remember the name of, or the name of the author but she talked about Vision Boards. Making a board with pictures and words ripped from various magazines and pasted onto a large poster board, you're then supposed to display it somewhere you will see it on almost a daily basis. The idea is that is depicts what you envision for your future and that these things will be drawn to you in some magical way. Hmmmm don't know about all that... I would kinda like to do it just to see how my particular board would look, kinda hap-hazard I'm sure. Probably would end up a hodge podge of weird crap all piled up into a heap of a mess with no co ordination what so ever. I don't think I even have a defined idea of what I envision for my future, I just sort of stumble through the days not even realizing we're supposed to plan for the days, weeks, years ahead. Doesn't it just keep coming and we keep on keeping on and that's about it?????  See how deep I can get at times!!! LOL.

If I paste a big old house and a cleaning lady on the board, will it happen???  I only want a big house so I can occasionally get away from the kids and have room to breathe... and so that I can have a "creative room" which is Blogger speak for a room where one can make and do stuff and not have to clean up the mess in order to eat dinner at the table. A nice sun room with a high end music system would also be up there at the top of the vision board, imagine spending time in a pretty, bright & sunny room, protected from the bugs with some  lovely music filling the air ... absolutely no TV in there!!!  OK, maybe this vision board could actually take shape after all.... I'll keep you posted. In the meantime if I do remember that chicks name and site I'll come back and update this post.... nah, that's prolly never gonna happen is it??

Tuesday October 11th......

There isn't anything particularly significant about today, and nothing particularly significant has happened over the past few days which leads to the question... what to blog about?

I'm coming out of a really bad few weeks days of feeling under the weather and therefore mentally defeated, I just think too much when I'm on my own or under the weather. I have come to the conclusion I really should read more fiction.  If I read more fiction I'd have less time to manifest thoughts of doom, gloom and downright paranoid schizophrenia!  Sometimes I think I'm going nuts, literally, then I realize I'm just a mid life Mama dealing with life's every day shit balls and that I'm no different to anyone else. How aloof of me to think that my drama is worse than yours!!!  So today is a non drama day. Today is only significant because it's the day I choose to be positive and forget all the little niggling soul destroying thoughts that bombard my brain when I am not at my full BS fighting fitness.

So... I'm going to blog about mushrooms and shopping lists..... yes that's right!

A while ago now a blogging friend of mine (who no longer blogs... leaving a hole in my entire existence) sent me a recipe for a lovely dish that involved mushrooms and broccoli and pasta. It's totally delish;  I just printed out her email and keep it in my recipe drawer.  Every time I bring it out to cook the meal I get to see a little bit of her personality, I don't have it on me otherwise I would reprint it here and you'd see why I love her so much!!! She wrote the recipe just how she talks and it makes me smile. I cooked it for His gorgeousness and myself on Saturday night and read the recipe again with a smile in my heart, can't wait to travel to St Louis soon and hopefully get a nano second to see her and give her a hug!!!!

Saturday morning I asked my lovely seven year old if she'd help me make a shopping list, the other child was sick so we divided and conquered.... youngest and myself did the weekly grocery shopping while oldest child stayed home puking and Dad cleaned up her mess! Perfect!
So, Ash was busying herself writing the shopping list asking me how to spell everything and drawing little pictures next to the items. She had written numbers down first and somehow decided we needed 25 items. When it got to number eleven she said "uh uh, I know what we need here... three bottles of wine!".  I have no idea how she determined we needed three but it sounded good to me so three it was!!! It's just amazing to me what goes on in that little head of hers, I have no earthly idea how people could have kids and not listen to them, interact with them or love them. I just don't understand it. I get so much pure joy from talking with my girls and including them in the day to day actions of running the household and planning stuff I can't imagine how boring it was before they came along. Just a shopping list... but she made it a memorable shopping list and brought a smile to my face on a crappy Saturday morning filled with crud and puke and jobs still waiting to be completed. What will I do when she's all growed up???

Randomonium Friday....

Hello Friends... well it's Friday and thank GOD for that!! this has truly been a week!!!! 

You know when you're all single and have no worries and you get sick and you can just

crawl under the duvet and come out when you feel better??? I long for those days. 

You know when you're married with kids and a job and responsibilities... you can't get sick

because there's no one there to take up the slack.. or feed the dogs... or get the kids to camp..

or do laundry... or make you something good and soothing to eat, like soup. 

There's no crawling under the duvet because there is still shit to be done and if you take time

off work you're an evil slacker and they won't pay you or worse you'll be mocked while

you are at home feeling less than human... fyi .. I really don't have any co-workers so 

that last part doesn't apply but I still feel bad for missing work. 

Do you sense I may have been sick this week? 

In other news... what the hell is up with that horrid, horrid of all fashion trends.. 

orange, black and white zig zags???? No ... please for the love of good taste

don't take part in this ridiculous fad. Zig zags have never been flattering and never will be.

Never ever.. stop the madness now! 

Bunting... now there's a thing. It's huge.. I am sure those of you way more up to date

and cooler than me have realized this for a while but I'm just getting on the bunting 

band wagon.. and I ADORE IT!!! I want to cover my whole house and back garden

in bunting... I want to Bunt my whole existence. I wonder if I could make teeny tiny

bunting and hang it around my neck? No? Maybe not... might be a little too clowny.

Just so you know.. my Mum who is just wired to spot trends a million miles away

sent me some bunting about what.. two or so years ago... see she knows what's hot.
FYI.. she's in a nursing home and hardly gets out.. and she's still cooler than me.

My youngest child asked a very interesting question this week while we were driving..

"are we rednecks or Christians?"

Ummm .. yeah that's a good question! what in the world would cause her to 

think that "redneck" was a religion? Growing up South GA... shakes head and runs

off to sign her up for the National League of Junior Cotillions..... 

Fall... definitely here.  We threw some scary looking dollar store bought stuff out on the

porch last week... maybe that's what prompted the question above! 

I actually hate decorating for Fall.. don't see the point... we never did stuff like that at 

home in Blighty but the girls always want some Halloween decorations so I cave and then

cringe every time I drive up to the house.  If only I had the time and inclination to make 

it a super duper display of classy, divine decor suited toward harvest festival rather than 

the macabre. But I don't... it's not something I have much interest in so I'll grin and 

bear it until Nov 1st when it's all coming down baby!!
I did see some cool Halloween bunting on Etsy... hmmm... yes!!!

yes... it's just bokeh... SOOC... I have to be the only bozo alive who can get
a pic of just bokeh!!!!!


So that's it from me... another crap post to make you wish you'd just blown on by
me in your reader... sorry! Still fuzzy headed and longing for a little rest and recuperation.
Stop by tomorrow to check out chicks... yes... Fall chicks.. like Easter 'cept in October.
I know.

Wordless Wednesday....

Macro Monday

This weeks link up to Macro Monday comes to you from Panacea Fl. 

A little fishing town in the Florida Panhandle it's located on Dickerson Bay, we walked 

along this little beach and checking out the plants and wildlife! 

This little fellow is a sand spur (this is the first time I've seen on actually on it's plant) they are 

usually found embedded in the most tender part of one's foot!!! EEoooucccchh!!! 

Monarchs find their way to this part of Florida every year.. very pretty.. if you like that kind of thing.

We all know that moths and butterflies are not my cup of tea...can't stand all that fluttering!